Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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