She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
