White coat. Heels.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
