If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
