he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
