Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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