i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
