SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
