I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
