And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
