that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
