You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Terrible idea I love it
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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