He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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