Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
