you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
