she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize