I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
