It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
