Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
porn star boner night. come get it.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
