i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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