these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
