Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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