I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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