I just made out with a guy for $7.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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