I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize