Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Randomize
