addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
