Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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