your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
