omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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