just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
