Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize