Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
