I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
