I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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