Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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