is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
