he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
