Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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