All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
The power of my boobs compel you
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize