I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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