David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
