He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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