Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Sex in the backyard? Check.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize