Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
