You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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