who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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