absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
