Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize
