He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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