i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
